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♋ PCG 4; Backdated to July 4, 50% Droned
Jul. 6th, 2011 11:06 am[Your name is Karkat Vantas. It is Fourth of July in the cozy small town you grew up in. You are waking up in your bedroom, which showcases your variety of interests. You have a passion for doing your schoolwork, helping dad in the toolshed, and going to the soda fountain with your pals. When you grow up, you aspire to be a police officer and help to keep the city safe.
It occurs to you this morning that you can't fucking stand this town. Even though it's your home, you ungrateful chump? No, you're being a fuckwitted asshole, you aren't even a human. Weren't the horns a dead giveaway? Wow, and now you're just being uncalled for!
You really seem to be two-minded today. On the one hand, You know that you were born here in Mayfield. On the other hand, YOU know that you're a troll who wriggled out of the mother grub's asshole on Alternia, and the other guy is a pan-usurping fuckstain.
>Karkat: express opinion loudly over the phone]
Okay. Fair fucking warning, everyone. I've been panscrubbed, but they've done a real dripping shit globe of a--
Holy lung-choking smokes, I can't believe what kind of dripping nosebleed is trying to take over my mind here. I mean, seriously, what did I do to deserve sharing a headcage with this rotting dopewad? It must have been pretty unimaginably terrible, so I apologize for that as well as for what an unrepentant piece of garbage the other me--
FUCK YOU! Do I go around interrupting your half-formed thoughts, as slobberingly moronic as they may be? Anyway, like I was saying, I'm sorry in advance for what a maladjusted humanfluid dribble my droned self is. And Terezi, if you're recording this, I fucking swear to all the human Jeguses that I'll--
Hey lamebrain, hold the phone! Are you seriously such a twisted abomination of common American decency that you're going to talk to a girl like that? Terezi, don't listen to this cad, he's so square that he comes to four finely honed--
Okay, seriously, shut your yammering pustular seedflap before you vomit an entire shit tidal wave all over this conversation, you embarrassing fuckstain residue! I'm trying to get a complete thought in here, and you-- OW! What the fuck, did you seriously just--
Don't act like you haven't been cruising for a knuckle sandwich all day, you classless amoral-- OW! Knock that-- OW, ow, fuck--
[The phone is still on, but the conversation seems to have dissolved into the sounds of insults and fighting.]
It occurs to you this morning that you can't fucking stand this town. Even though it's your home, you ungrateful chump? No, you're being a fuckwitted asshole, you aren't even a human. Weren't the horns a dead giveaway? Wow, and now you're just being uncalled for!
You really seem to be two-minded today. On the one hand, You know that you were born here in Mayfield. On the other hand, YOU know that you're a troll who wriggled out of the mother grub's asshole on Alternia, and the other guy is a pan-usurping fuckstain.
>Karkat: express opinion loudly over the phone]
Okay. Fair fucking warning, everyone. I've been panscrubbed, but they've done a real dripping shit globe of a--
Holy lung-choking smokes, I can't believe what kind of dripping nosebleed is trying to take over my mind here. I mean, seriously, what did I do to deserve sharing a headcage with this rotting dopewad? It must have been pretty unimaginably terrible, so I apologize for that as well as for what an unrepentant piece of garbage the other me--
FUCK YOU! Do I go around interrupting your half-formed thoughts, as slobberingly moronic as they may be? Anyway, like I was saying, I'm sorry in advance for what a maladjusted humanfluid dribble my droned self is. And Terezi, if you're recording this, I fucking swear to all the human Jeguses that I'll--
Hey lamebrain, hold the phone! Are you seriously such a twisted abomination of common American decency that you're going to talk to a girl like that? Terezi, don't listen to this cad, he's so square that he comes to four finely honed--
Okay, seriously, shut your yammering pustular seedflap before you vomit an entire shit tidal wave all over this conversation, you embarrassing fuckstain residue! I'm trying to get a complete thought in here, and you-- OW! What the fuck, did you seriously just--
Don't act like you haven't been cruising for a knuckle sandwich all day, you classless amoral-- OW! Knock that-- OW, ow, fuck--
[The phone is still on, but the conversation seems to have dissolved into the sounds of insults and fighting.]