♋ PCG 10; backdated to Thursday

[crusthatecean]

[Action; Outside 1338 Benny Road!]

[Early Thursday morning, there's a strange sight out on Benny Road. A terrifying crab monster appears to be menacing a young troll lad! Karkat is trying to fend off the crab monster with a garden tool and appears to mostly be managing it, but the monster won't stop trying to grab him with its claws.]

[Action; 1338 Benny Road; Later]

[Later that day, in a house that smells horribly of fish but is much cleaner than usual, Karkat is sitting on the couch watching TV. The crab monster is lurking behind the house, occasionally growling until Karkat feeds him some fish from a can.]

Comments

morning!

[miraculls.livejournal.com]

[Gamzee's weird-ass sleeping hours means that he's actually up in time to see this, blinking blearily at the sight.]

...whooooa, best friend, your motherfuckin' lusus came back! [good job Gamzee, Karkat would have never noticed if you hadn't pointed this out]

[crusthatecean.livejournal.com]

[He's swiping at Crabdad with his sickle and mostly ignoring Gamzee.]

Asshole, don't you know what diurnal means?

[Crabdad skrees and clicks his claws angrily at Karkat.]

Fuck you! You can't even talk, why do you care?

[miraculls.livejournal.com]

Uhhhh...no, bro, what does it mean?

[holds out a hand to crabdad like a proper young gentletroll]

Heeeeeeeey, crabfucker, how you doing? [whoops well he tried okay manners are hard!!]

[crusthatecean.livejournal.com]

Get out of the way, dumb fuck!

[Getting in the way to prevent Gamzee from getting smacked by a claw.]

Holy shit, why do you have to be such a fucking pain? Yes, he always wears makeup like that, who cares?

Morning

[lamingtons]

[So, Australia just got undroned this morning and is pretty annoyed about being droned in the first place but that doesn't matter anymore because now he is the happiest fucker alive. It's a giant crab!]

[Oh, but wait...]

... No way I'm gonna find a pot big enough for that.

[crusthatecean.livejournal.com]

[Pausing in hitting the crab over the head with the butt of his sickle to glare at Australia. The crab takes the opportunity to pinch Karkat by the back of his shirt.]

...What the fuck is your problem?

[lamingtons]

He looks delicious!

[crusthatecean.livejournal.com]

[To the crab:]

Let go! Just one fucking second, I told you I don't have any of your stupid roe cubes.

[The crab doesn't let go at all, but he still waves his sickle at Australia.]

Don't even think about it, shamesack! I can and should kick your disgusting pink ass for this shit you're talking. Who the fuck does that?

[lamingtons]

But it's a compliment.

[Comes closer and taps his knuckles on the crab's claw.] Tough looking bastard you got here, what a beaut....

[crusthatecean.livejournal.com]

[The crab snaps his claw and hisses, but he seems somewhat pacified in a, well, crabby sort of way.

Karkat's expression is practically the same.]

However you intended it, and I'm hoping this is just a cultural thing, threatening to eat my lusus and then calling him a 'beaut' is some fucked up stuff.

Do I go to your hive and threaten to cook your mature human custodian?

[lamingtons]

You could try, but I reckon he'd be a bit stringy! And it wasn't a threat, I said I wouldn't be able to do it.

[Pats the crab... If he can't eat it, he wants to befriend it...] Is lusus his species? What's his name? What kind of music does he like?

[crusthatecean.livejournal.com]

[The crab is not a friendly sort of individual; the best you're going to get is grumpy hissing. But the fact that he's stopped attacking means that he actually sort of likes Australia.]

He's a fucking crab, that should be obvious, and he doesn't have a name. Lusus just means that he's my guardian, unfortunately. And his taste in music is so embarrassingly shitty, don't even get him started.

[lamingtons]

[Yeah, he's sort of used the animals where "not gnawing my face off" is a sign of being the best of friends, so that's cool.]

He needs a name. Looks like a Percival to me. Don't worry, Perce, my kids make fun of me too, they don't know shit, 'm sure your music is fine!

[crusthatecean.livejournal.com]

His name isn't Percival. He doesn't fucking need a name, he's a crab!

[The crab hisses and snaps at Karkat, trying to usher him back towards the door of the house.]

[lamingtons]

[Sorry, Karkat, but there are no words to describe how less interesting you are than a giant crab. Australia ignores him completely, chatting away pleasantly to the crab.]

So, Perce, how's it going? You just arrive? Know I would have noticed a beauty like you before, I'm sure... You settling in alright? No one trying to shove ya into boiling water?

[crusthatecean.livejournal.com]

He doesn't talk, idiot. But yeah, he just got here, and so far you're the only asshole trying to shove him into boiling water, so there's that.

[Crabdad responds that this place is very strange, his young charge is trying to go out past curfew, and he wants his goddamn chilled roe cubes.

Actually, he just hisses and skrees and snaps his claws, but it was implied.]

[lamingtons]

Mhmm! [Nods along, as if he can totally understand everyone one of the hisses, skrees and snaps.] Ah, tough luck, mate!

morning!!

[bullsit.livejournal.com]

[Awkwardly waves from the sidewalk wow this is sure to get his attention!]

Oh, uh, hey Karkat, and Karkat's lusus.

[crusthatecean.livejournal.com]

You don't understand him.

If you do, though, tell him humans are a diurnal species so it's ridiculous to have curfew in the morning here, and they don't have fucking roe in the store so there's nothing I can do.

Because holy shit, he will not goddamn listen.

[crusthatecean.livejournal.com]

[Yeah, not noticing this. Sorry bro. But then Crabdad snaps something at Karkat and he glances over.]

Oh. Hi.

Have you regained your freakish ability to make stubborn shithead animals listen to you? Because this asshole will not fucking calm down.

[bullsit.livejournal.com]

No, uh, sorry, I can't commune yet, and trying, really hard, only just gives me, um, a headache.

He seems happy, uh, to see you though.

[crusthatecean.livejournal.com]

Too bad, he's a real pain. He won't stop insisting it's past curfew.

[Since Karkat is distracted by Tavros, he now has his arm caught in a pincer.]

Let go!

[bullsit.livejournal.com]

Did you try just talking to him, and asking nicely if you can stay up, a little later? That always worked, with Tinkerbull.

[crusthatecean.livejournal.com]

He's completely unreasonable. I don't see why he has to always lose it over every stupid thing!

[...]

[bullsit.livejournal.com]

He, uh, probably just cares a lot, about you, and wants the best for you, and other lusus things.