Karkat Vantas (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
crusthatecean) wrote2011-07-17 11:30 am
crusthatecean) wrote2011-07-17 11:30 am
♋ PCG 6
[Audio Hook; Not Filtered]
Okay, so we're all sharing. Perfect. I can't avoid it anymore, so why not? I have to say, I can't manage to give two minuscule fucks about most of your problems, so maybe you won't give any fucks for mine, either, and I'm fine with that. Maybe the town making me spill the partially digested contents of my alimentary canal will finally make me hate it here. Everyone's so ready to find a way out, but my entire species is dead aside from a few of us, and there's a good chance rest of us aren't going to survive, and this place is able to bring some of us back. It's not as bad as all of you think, grow the fuck up.
No one ever asked me to be leader. I just pitched a massive shit fit about it like I always do, and no one wanted to deal with it or cared, so here I am. I guess I just wanted people to show me some fucking respect for once, which is some seriously shitty reasoning, but that's how it is. But I thought I did a pretty damn good job. I mean, all of us were basically huge gaping assholes, but we didn't get too off track and we beat the game in good time and everything.
And then it all crumbled into crusty dry turd flakes. We lost everything and then we started to fall apart and...a bunch of us died. Don't ask me how many, I don't know. Maybe all of us. But I blamed everyone for this shit. Mostly the humans, and I made a huge asshole out of myself trying to troll them, but it turned out it wasn't their fault. I could blame some of us for making a big shit show of everything, but I guess I'm too fucking sentimental and tender-hearted to put the blame for our absolute and total failure at the feet of any of them. Because I actually like them. Most of them. Maybe all of them, I don't know.
But I do know who I think screwed everything up for us. I've never exactly been fond of this douchebag. He got saddled with a mutant blood color that put him somewhere below shitclogged load gaper on the hemospectrum and instead of just dealing with it he hid it from everyone and pretended not to care about any of that like typing in stupid gray font and acting like an asshole all the time would make it not matter to anyone else. But then he decided he wanted to feel better about himself, so he insisted on being in charge and being a leader and went around acting important and making an ass of himself in bullshit memos and then when everything went wrong he just stood there and wasn't able to do anything. When a really good friend of his was killed, he just stood there, and when someone else was starting to lose it he didn't notice until the ship had already sailed to murderous rampage harbor and instead he just got caught up in some more petty bullshit. It's not anyone else's fault or problem because it wasn't anyone else's fucking responsibility, and that's all there is to it. Probably. Or maybe I just can't stand him and I'd rather have the blame resting squarely on his cartilage nub than anyone else's. I never wanted any of you to die, I really mean that.
...Yeah, this is just getting sad now. Not that it wasn't sad from the beginning. And no, I'm not talking about past and future selves, that's always been such a hilariously pathetic cop out. I know I didn't cause everything, but I didn't stop it. I blundered through every step of the way and accomplished nothing. But don't I feel better now for getting that all off my nub? No, I don't. I really don't. If you sat around listening to this pulsating wave of self-pity vomit, go fuck yourself.
[The phone hangs up with a loud slam.]
((You can call him back. Fair warning, he'll probably be pretty awful to anyone who responds.))
Okay, so we're all sharing. Perfect. I can't avoid it anymore, so why not? I have to say, I can't manage to give two minuscule fucks about most of your problems, so maybe you won't give any fucks for mine, either, and I'm fine with that. Maybe the town making me spill the partially digested contents of my alimentary canal will finally make me hate it here. Everyone's so ready to find a way out, but my entire species is dead aside from a few of us, and there's a good chance rest of us aren't going to survive, and this place is able to bring some of us back. It's not as bad as all of you think, grow the fuck up.
No one ever asked me to be leader. I just pitched a massive shit fit about it like I always do, and no one wanted to deal with it or cared, so here I am. I guess I just wanted people to show me some fucking respect for once, which is some seriously shitty reasoning, but that's how it is. But I thought I did a pretty damn good job. I mean, all of us were basically huge gaping assholes, but we didn't get too off track and we beat the game in good time and everything.
And then it all crumbled into crusty dry turd flakes. We lost everything and then we started to fall apart and...a bunch of us died. Don't ask me how many, I don't know. Maybe all of us. But I blamed everyone for this shit. Mostly the humans, and I made a huge asshole out of myself trying to troll them, but it turned out it wasn't their fault. I could blame some of us for making a big shit show of everything, but I guess I'm too fucking sentimental and tender-hearted to put the blame for our absolute and total failure at the feet of any of them. Because I actually like them. Most of them. Maybe all of them, I don't know.
But I do know who I think screwed everything up for us. I've never exactly been fond of this douchebag. He got saddled with a mutant blood color that put him somewhere below shitclogged load gaper on the hemospectrum and instead of just dealing with it he hid it from everyone and pretended not to care about any of that like typing in stupid gray font and acting like an asshole all the time would make it not matter to anyone else. But then he decided he wanted to feel better about himself, so he insisted on being in charge and being a leader and went around acting important and making an ass of himself in bullshit memos and then when everything went wrong he just stood there and wasn't able to do anything. When a really good friend of his was killed, he just stood there, and when someone else was starting to lose it he didn't notice until the ship had already sailed to murderous rampage harbor and instead he just got caught up in some more petty bullshit. It's not anyone else's fault or problem because it wasn't anyone else's fucking responsibility, and that's all there is to it. Probably. Or maybe I just can't stand him and I'd rather have the blame resting squarely on his cartilage nub than anyone else's. I never wanted any of you to die, I really mean that.
...Yeah, this is just getting sad now. Not that it wasn't sad from the beginning. And no, I'm not talking about past and future selves, that's always been such a hilariously pathetic cop out. I know I didn't cause everything, but I didn't stop it. I blundered through every step of the way and accomplished nothing. But don't I feel better now for getting that all off my nub? No, I don't. I really don't. If you sat around listening to this pulsating wave of self-pity vomit, go fuck yourself.
[The phone hangs up with a loud slam.]
((You can call him back. Fair warning, he'll probably be pretty awful to anyone who responds.))
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Fuck off! Don't you have better shit to do? Oh wait, I doubt it.
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However, as you probably haven't noticed, I'm not able to keep my ugly talk flap shut today, so I don't really want to have any conversations I might regret. Any more conversations.
1/2
Miracles. Everywhere.]
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Think you can open it to kick back one of these motherfuckin' wicked starmonkey elixers, though?
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[There are some things Gamzee doesn't need to know, but Karkat has a plan.]
Wow, look out the window. Have you ever noticed how blue the human sky is? What a fucking miracle.
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Whoooooa, you're right! How...how the fuck is it so beautiful? Look at all them motherfuckin' clouds, all fluffy and shit.
[stares at the sky and spaces out for a few minutes before blinking and turning back to Karkat]
...sorry, best friend, did you all up and say something?
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This isn't going to work.
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Soooooory. Anythin' I can do to be lending my fine brother a motherfuckin' hand?
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I'll take that soda.
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[hands it over, then opens his own and drinks, staring out the window for a few minutes again before he suddenly speaks up]
Gotta say though, much as I be loving this miracle land, I kinda miss the sea back home.
[Yeah, he's also at the 'blurting out secrets' stage of the event...not that there's really much of a difference.]
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I don't miss much about home. It's mostly small, stupid things. And the old crab, but I try not to think much about him.
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I guess it really ain't so much the sea, more just watchin' out for the old goat and waitin' for him to show up. Can't really do that here with the grubwater they got goin' on.
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I don't get it at all. You annoy the fuck out of me, but I've always liked you a lot. How could you wind up being like that?
Don't ask what I'm talking about.
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if no one breaks it, he just spaces out during the hug and forgets it's even happening
sometimes he passes out on them]