crusthatecean | ♋ PCG 13

[Action, 1338 Benny Road; Thursday afternoon]

[Well, Karkat intended to go to the Post Office as soon as the zombie threat was finished. But early the next morning, he was forced to go to school instead, so it's not until afterward that he's able to make it.

Finally, he manages to make it back to his hive with an unwieldy recuperacoon, only to be greeted by Jade's drone, even though she was fine just earlier that day. Between being stuck as a human again and finding out about that, he's in a bad mood, so he'll just be sitting on the couch channel flipping next to the recuperacoon and judging everything on TV.]

[Phone]

Guess what? I'm human again. Karkat, really? You're human? Wow, I didn't recognize you at all! How'd that happen? When are you going back to normal? What do you look like now? Wait, we've never met, but you're were a species other than human in the first place?

There, that's all out of the way. We can now returned to your regularly scheduled not giving a shit about this. Anyone who does decide to bother me about this subject will be ignored in the iciest fashion possible.

In much more important but equally beyond our ability to do anything about news, Harley is apparently panscrubbed. No, I don't know why or how long she'll be gone for.

((OOC: Karkat is human again, and will be until I say otherwise even if I use his troll icons. He looks pretty much the same only not grey with horns and with browner hair and brown eyes. Not red like in the icons, yeah.))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

As little as I can believe that, that's something, I guess?

But in the long run, not really. I'm biased because I fucking hate you, but you know what? Even that aside, when I look back on the time we were actually friends? All I can think was what was the fucking point. I listen to you go on about your problems and struggle to give a shit and give useful advice, but there was never anything there for me besides my apparently crippling need to get involved in other peoples' romantic lives.

I'm not even trying to be a douchebag to you right now, although I know I am being one, but the fact is you use people and you don't really care about anyone but yourself. Maybe it's fucking different with Harley, I don't know, but I find it difficult to believe. And being pale for someone isn't all friendship and skipping through meadows holding hands. It can be draining and awful and it can feel like you're giving so much of yourself to someone even though what you're trying to do is probably hopeless. It's a terrible thing to put yourself through if you can't look at the person you're doing it for and know without any doubt that they are worth it.

And I just don't think you're worth it. So that's basically all I have to say about the matter.

I'm tryin' to do the best I can to be helpin' her I mean I did give her some comfort when you had decided to be runnin' away from the hive. She was lookin' so sad an' I really didn't like it.

[aaand that was a huge blow to his self-esteem. Hearing that there was no point in being friends with him from someone he actually trusted the guidance of...there's a few sniffles over the phone, but he really tries to hide it. For dramatic effect, really. Though it causes him to get a little angry. He's trying to be worth something to someone dammit, and he really wants the world to see that.]

Kar I try to be givin' a shit about others but its just fustratin'. Hard to be carin' when you're so high on the hemospectrum but anyways it's not like that even fuckin' matters in this human place. I'm really tryin' to care though. Even ask Jade I'm sure she'd be vouchin' for me. Hell I even am listenin' to her. Decided to be tryin' out actin' cause she was suggestin' it. Doin' all a' that work to be the center a' attention is seemin' like its worth it. Probably a fuckin' natural at it that's for sure.

There is somethin' different between what we've been feelin'. I know you're takin' good care a' her an' all. You're right normally I wouldn't be givin' a fuck about people but with Jade... somethin's different. I don't really like seein' her sad she's not deservin' a' the shit this place is puttin' us through. Normally I wouldn't be sayin' that about people especially a fuckin' landdweller...but she reminds me a' Fef. In a good way.

[He's listening, and for a brief second, he's almost swayed. Not swayed into thinking this is a good idea, but swayed at least into thinking that maybe this wouldn't be the worst idea.

And then Eridan mentions Feferi.]

Because you were such a good friend to Feferi. Because all you ever wanted was to make her happy and it never had anything to do with the dusty cavernous corridors of your quadrants.

I spent what must have been fucking sweeps of my life listening to you go on about her. I really believed you loved her. And I can't fucking stand that I almost bought the same sorry song and dance again.

I did, Kar! I just didn't play my cards right and my jealousy was gettin' in the way a' things...When everythin' went to shit I had been losin' all hope an' just snapped without her to be keepin' me from doin' so.

[well, at least he understands that much.]

Fef an' I are gettin' along just fine here we're startin' from square one. Hopin' I could be doin' things right this time. Jade was tellin' me to start these relationships off on a' slow note so maybe I can be workin' it out to be better for both a' us an' see where the road's leadin'. Bein' plain ol' friends is better than us hatin' each other I suppose.

[dramatic sigh]

Are you serious? Don't you think--

[He suddenly stops in mid-sentence. There's a short pause, and then his tone is suddenly even angrier than it was before.]

No.

No.

I'm not doing this. I refuse to be the asshole who sits around and listens to your problems again. Find someone else to attach yourself to like a parasite wearing the world's ugliest scarf, and for your sake it had better not be Harley.

[okay, now he's starting to cry. Especially with being told to stay away from Jade. They were friends, things were going good. It was taking all of Eridan's power to not go over and do some old fashioned culling but the recent events with Jade kept him sane. He'll continue to ramble though, since when has he been one to listen?]

Kar Jade's panscrubbed I can't honestly be goin' to her with my problems right now can I? An' it's not like I can be goin' to anyone else for this you've always been the best at it. Yeah sure, go to the person in question about all a' the awkwardness. It's fustratin' to feel that this person should honestly fuckin' hate you an' they don't even after what you fuckin' did to them. Not that I want that kinda thing out a' Fef. I'm grateful she's givin' the whole friendship thing a second chance don't get me wrong. What the fuck do I do if it ever fuckin' comes up? I know there's all a' this timeline bullshit an' she may be from before all a' this but I don't want to be scarin' her away from me an' undoin' all a' the work I just did.

An' as for Jade I'm gonna try my hardest an' not fuck this up. Cause it seems like she's one a' the only people who fuckin' understands me.

Eridan.

I don't fucking care.

Goodbye.

[Hangs up.]

♋ PCG 13

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