Karkat Vantas (
crusthatecean) wrote2011-10-06 11:58 pm
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♋ PCG 14
[Action; 1668 Benny Road]
[So, for the past few days, Karkat has been feeling vaguely off; just occasionally sneezing or rubbing his eyes. His troll self doesn't have allergies, so he doesn't really know what's going on, but as a human, he's definitely feeling it.
Finally, he wakes up one morning feeling sick enough that the female human drone doesn't drag him out of bed in the morning but instead calls school forces him to stay in bed. Anyone in the house can probably hear him swearing at her and occasionally trying to escape in the morning before he ultimately just gives up.]
[Phone; Later]
[Spending an entire day sitting around feeling miserable is really frustrating to him. So instead of being sick like a normal person, he spends the entire day drawing up a ridiculously complicated plan, and now he's calling about it. You can definitely hear from his voice that he's under the weather, though.]
Hey. So, considering the high frequency of situations involving dangerous undead hordes, inducements to kill each other, or just general examples of everything not bothering to stop for breaks on the road to catastrophe at all times, it's kind of surprising in a witness the clearest example of the failings of the human race sort of way that there isn't any system in place for what we're supposed to do. We have brand new clueless assholes showing up at least once a month and if they happen to get stuck in the wrong hive and don't know anyone who'll hold their hand through everything, we're saying they're shit out of luck. Oh, yeah, please call in and ask why I use hive instead of house and wonder if I'm a bee, that will be so helpful.
I don't particularly care about anyone clueless and new, but the odds are some of you do, right? And if not, just think that you might get panscrubbed (okay, droned, is that clear enough for you) and then you'll be the asshole with no idea what's going on.
Anyway, what I want is to hear from someone in every house in Mayfield. Let me know who in your sickening fake family unit can actually fight, who is a fucking psychopath we need to avoid at all costs, and whether or not you're willing to take in anyone extra next time everything goes to hell. I'll get the information out there when I have it so maybe it will be useful to someone unlike everything else anyone does around here.
If you call in with attempts to rile me up, observations that my alien culture isn't exactly the same as your own and that is somehow humorous, or anything that isn't on topic, I'm hanging up, so just answer the question.
[So, for the past few days, Karkat has been feeling vaguely off; just occasionally sneezing or rubbing his eyes. His troll self doesn't have allergies, so he doesn't really know what's going on, but as a human, he's definitely feeling it.
Finally, he wakes up one morning feeling sick enough that the female human drone doesn't drag him out of bed in the morning but instead calls school forces him to stay in bed. Anyone in the house can probably hear him swearing at her and occasionally trying to escape in the morning before he ultimately just gives up.]
[Phone; Later]
[Spending an entire day sitting around feeling miserable is really frustrating to him. So instead of being sick like a normal person, he spends the entire day drawing up a ridiculously complicated plan, and now he's calling about it. You can definitely hear from his voice that he's under the weather, though.]
Hey. So, considering the high frequency of situations involving dangerous undead hordes, inducements to kill each other, or just general examples of everything not bothering to stop for breaks on the road to catastrophe at all times, it's kind of surprising in a witness the clearest example of the failings of the human race sort of way that there isn't any system in place for what we're supposed to do. We have brand new clueless assholes showing up at least once a month and if they happen to get stuck in the wrong hive and don't know anyone who'll hold their hand through everything, we're saying they're shit out of luck. Oh, yeah, please call in and ask why I use hive instead of house and wonder if I'm a bee, that will be so helpful.
I don't particularly care about anyone clueless and new, but the odds are some of you do, right? And if not, just think that you might get panscrubbed (okay, droned, is that clear enough for you) and then you'll be the asshole with no idea what's going on.
Anyway, what I want is to hear from someone in every house in Mayfield. Let me know who in your sickening fake family unit can actually fight, who is a fucking psychopath we need to avoid at all costs, and whether or not you're willing to take in anyone extra next time everything goes to hell. I'll get the information out there when I have it so maybe it will be useful to someone unlike everything else anyone does around here.
If you call in with attempts to rile me up, observations that my alien culture isn't exactly the same as your own and that is somehow humorous, or anything that isn't on topic, I'm hanging up, so just answer the question.
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Okay, thanks for replying with actual useful comments.
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I'm getting tired of the stupid bullcrap of this town. At least someone is making a list that could be productive.
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It's not like it's an environment that lends itself to stability.
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It's stupid to have only one copy of any documents here. We should be making several. Get them into circulation so people know what's actually KNOWN and here.
The big problem with your plan, though, is going to be updating. I mean are you going to make this announcement every time it swings around to when people come in, or what?
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I'll copy the information and disperse it, and someone every month needs to take the job of updating it. While we're here, I can handle that. The odds are not even half the town is going to bother to respond.
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No. It's time to stop acting like a jackass. He needs to at least TRY not to be one.]
Sounds good to me. That's why those who do respond also need to tell about any other problems they know.
753 Partridge Drive. There's a guy there named Black Mage. He's stupid, crazy, evil, and powerful. Thought you should know.
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Good. Okay, I'll write that one down. I'm not going to publicize that we're listening who everyone thinks the crazies are, though. All that will accomplish is bringing out the grudges so it will be impossible to tell who is actually a problem
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He's dangerous. I'll just leave it at that.
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So y'know something? I'd kinda like to know who I just gave my personal information to.
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Tch. Know that feeling. There's some pathetic shmucks out there.
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Satisfied I'm not putting your information to some nefarious use?
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Really, if we don't trust some of the losers here, we're not going to get anywhere.
[And that's a lesson that took him about a year to figure out.]
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Least most mistakes here aren't....permanent, either.
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Anyway. I'd better go.
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Talk to you later I guess.
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